That reminds me of an anecdote that my high school English teacher used to tell, as a way of cautioning against use of thesauruses: some student substituted "flatus" for "wind" in their composition, writing something like "a gentle flatus was blowing from the bay".
To be fair, the fault is at shaming the gentle flatus.
A flatus so gentle, it was almost as if there had been no wind at all.
Only the gentle sound of the woodwinds revealed that there was a slight, silent flatus.