Without YouTube and porn, is there really an internet?

More like without video, is there still internet..... Absolutely yes. It's a tad hyperbolic I agree

My kids strongly disagree.

Fortnight isn't a video

although, somewhat ironic to your argument, I bet the intro that fornite plays when starting the game uses ffmpeg

It would still be a game without the intro video.

For us- sure.

For most of the internet users- very likely no. Social media and video streaming IS the internet for the majority

it sounds like paradise, we should start working toward this immediately