> Millennials are a generation that has fallen into the trap of constant self-development

Self-development brought me so much though. I am happily married because of it, and probably wouldn’t have been romantically seen without it.

I know this because I have a friend who is a lot like me and he didn’t develop himself enough and he stays single. Because of his strides in self-development from back in the day. He does get a lot of dates, but every time they say after one or two dates that they should just be friends.

It’s harsh to say he didn’t develop himself enough. I also find it true. He didn’t find it worth it to overcome his fears and wants to stay in his comfort zone. He has fun playing sports, board games with friends and video games. But I also know that he yearns for a romantic connection. And that’s the issue.

I do agree that for people like me and my friend the self-development route is really demanding. I simply hate being single more. So I dedicated my life to it, and at some point I figured it out and realized it was more like a 5 year journey of which 4 years were back to back and then 1 year spread out over like 12 years (so a good month per year, I didn’t need to do more).

Now I’m on a similar journey for financial independence but I’m noticing that I don’t have a similar drive. Constantly forcing myself to do self-development is now perhaps too much to ask.

So I guess it also depends on once drive.