Do you understand you are very likely in the top 15% of the country in income earners, how do you expect people making less than $80k (of which there are plenty of programmers that make this amount)?
Do you understand that your extreme massive privilege is something very few people will ever able to obtain? What should they do? Work until they're 80 and die on the job?
Yes, I absolutely understand that. I'm refuting the idea that it's not possible to do with a family and kids.