This is going to be a bit dry, but I'm going to overshare too much if I won't keep it compact.

Solitude is a grace when you have deep respect / is inspired by the world, life, or something more specific, because you belong to a construct you have a model for, and thus you have an obvious list of actions and values.

It's very intimidating when you don't though, because you feel lost and can't see a clear way to gain momentum - and movement is life, as they say. There are two things that can help with that.

1. Listening the ideas of people that share a language and values with you, but don't necessarily share your vision. These are friends, most of the time. I get that you might've distanced from yours and they might've become entirely different people, but try reconnecting with them, one at a time. What mends you here is paying attention to what these people worry about - it gives you choice of things to be enthusiastic about (which then makes more friends, initiatives, impact, which are all "movement" of sorts). Try not to fall for trap of "spending time to silence the doubts and discomfort" as that's the same as doing "snooze" on an alarm. You can try to find those people on conferences, language clubs, but they're pretty much everywhere, you should just pick the context that feels least awkward to start a conversation in.

2. Change of context. There's a pretty big chance of gaining momentum while traveling, because your attention sharpens while you're in an environment that is hard to predict. You'll notice a lot of things you enjoy or hate, some of them might inspire you to study, try something new or empathize to a different way of living.

There's a bonus one - building something for someone is very fulfilling for the usual auditory of HN. There's a lot of people who'd be glad to use a helping hand, just pick a person / group you'd be ok to help and ask what can you do for them with your talents / skills. You'll be surprised how glad you'll be that you did that.

P.S. There are also thinner rationales behind what I've written, and I explained it rather mechanistically, but basically that's what helped me a lot when I suffered from an abrupt cutoff from the community that was a big part of my life.

P.P.S. I'm young, but it probably doesn't matter as much. Have a virtual hug from me ;). I think it's going to be better for you rather soon!