> So... use a reamp box to make it hiZ again?

That is going to be something like a transformer to step down your line level signal and some series resistance to match the load to help drive the amp.

An actual coil pickup has reactive impedance that is frequency dependent and will result in a more complex interaction between the devices.

> The pedals and system being dependent on the high impedance was always a bug, not a feature

Sure if you think like an engineer, but everything you are complaining about is what allows someone like Jimi Hendrix to do what he did with a guitar.