You can expect the individual to compensate for a poorly structured society all you want.

> you can get in trouble if you recklessly leave around or provide alcohol/guns/cigarettes for a minor to start using

You can only expect so much from individual responsibility. At some point you need to structure society to compensate for the inevitable failures that occur.

> They are in a much better and informed position to do so than a creepy surveillance nanny state.

I'd rather live in a nanny state than ever trust american parenting. We've demonstrated a million times over that that doesn't work and produces even more fucked up people and abused children.