Do you get a dopamine hit out of this?

Nothing about a dopamine hit out of it, no. Something about _main being an undefined symbol. Are you familiar with that error message?

How did your equivalent assembly program without a definition of _main to?

You're doing that thing. I think it's called "trolling". It goes like "hurr durr, they said take one, but they wouldn't let me take one plate" or "hurr durr, I filled my gas tank with nitrogen, which is a gas, but my car doesn't go" or "hurr durr, they said C++ features are all optional, but I don't want to use letters, how can I write C++ without using letters?"

At least when that guy asked Stack Overflow how to make gcc compile his .png, it was actually funny.

> your equivalent assembly program

Right now,

    hlt
    jmp $0
I intend to add more later, of course, but I until I get past this hurdle I am unable to start. Does that help narrow things down for you?