Try Toast Hawaii. The weird mix of ham, pineapple and cheese the Germans make.

I am still convinced the lava cheese insulator is there only to burn people's insides with boiling pineapple.

Thanks for the recommendation, I will go out and try this, despite the belief that some people hold about Hawaii Toast giving you cancer[1].

1: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toast_Hawaii

But that’s because of the water content of pineapple, so now we’re back at water..

Although pineapple flavoured floor heating does sound delicious.