SWE is a demanding job in general so just be prepared to actually "work". as others have said look at large companies where tech is not the selling point. insurance, banks, aviation, large fortune 500 companies.
i've noticed that it is sometimes less about the type of company and more about the immediate manager and their mindset. a competent manager can set expectations with external stakeholders while not overloading their engineers. a good middle manager who can play politics with multiple stakeholders and becomes "liked" really leads to a chill job if they have the correct expectations of their career as well.
> i've noticed that it is sometimes less about the type of company and more about the immediate manager and their mindset.
It's definitely about that. The current company I'm at, I met my manager and have good chemistry with him. Since then, within a year, I got 3 new managers. The department is a mess. My first manager is mentoring me formally. I'm mostly still a part of his team.
His mentorship makes it much easier to stay for me.