> and started to write messages in the vein of “if you’re reading this message, I’ll give u $5”. I never paid anyone a dollar.

Meh, most people wont address it or ask that dollar. It does not mean I did not read it, I chuckled and moved on.

I do read every commit on PR chain and every line. I am not necessary super attentive reviewer or something, but I never accept it without at least formally looking at it.