You are a free spirit, and the very first to take a bullet in the head when someone (in time of war) will tell/order you "do _this_" and you will say "no". Better a corpse than a naysayer.
I don't know how many here are Iron Maiden fans/listeners, but for those who don't know their work, I propose a read at the lyrics of The Trooper [0]
[0]: https://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/ironmaiden/thetrooper.html
War is hell.
War is worse than hell. In hell there are no innocent bystanders.
Hell technically is a bunch of people who didn't repent. Might be pretty much like normal life, people wise.
Saw Warfare tonight at the cinema. Brutal doesn’t really get very close. Definitely seems like hell.